The doll, one of the nicest girls around, is a great help around the house…
“Mom really?” The doll said while reading over my shoulder. “What?” I asked and quickly attempted to switch off the screen I was reading. “The dictator?” “What? Don’t you like the little pet names your brother gives you?” “If this was your brother Danny calling you that would you?” Smiling at her use of my younger brother I said “Naw, I’d have probably slugged him” Laughing at my response she added, “You see, I’ve used much restraint…” “That and your brother is bigger and stronger.” I added.
She maneuvered herself from behind me to the front; her clear design to sit on my lap. This has been one of the doll’s signature moves for years. As her weight came to rest on my legs, she turned her upper torso, looked directly at me and said “Mom how come none of your blogs ever start out with something nice about me and the boy?” Taken aback I briefly lost my ability to speak without a stammer
“Wha wha…ttt …Are…You woo woo ….Talking…About??” “Well I mean…” She began to back track. “Go on spit it out…” I said. “It’s just lately you’ve been mean.”
Letting the words sink in for a moment I eventually replied “Isn’t that what my blog implies?” “Mom you know what I mean…” “Hmmm well let’s see, in the last week I wrote about a funeral for a wild animal we held…and um…about how well organized you are. Hmmm…not too mean there” I replied with a sarcastic ring in my voice. “What about the one about my pants not staying up?” She asked. “Oh well that was more about you having a flat bottom more than anything else…” I said. “I hate having a flat butt” the doll added. “If its any consolation, you come by it naturally” I replied. Swatting me on the arm she said “It doesn’t”.
“So where were we?” I asked. “I just think you could be a little nicer when writing about me…” “..and your brother? I asked. Shrugging her shoulders she said “I suppose–though I bet that’s really hard” she giggled. Seizing the opportunity to tickle her I replied “Harder than you can imagine…” After a few moments of her twisting and leaning on me to stop I did just that. She then leaned down to give me a hug and asked “Mommy can I write the first line of your new blog?” Finding it difficult to say “No” while embraced in a hug I said “Sure”.
“The doll, one of the nicest girls around, is a great help around the house…” She typed. Turning to look back at me she said, now be nice and finish the sentence” “…she makes sure the chore lists are equally divided between the boy and herself; giving the boy the harder…..” “Mom!!” she yelled and swatted at my arms. Laughing I said “Just goes to show…once a mean mom always a mean mom” and proceeded to laugh and tickle her some more.
When all was said and done I said “You know doll this blog really does make you look pretty good and someday you’ll understand that more”. Getting up from my lap she said in feigned disgust “Well someday is too far away!”
and walked out of the room. Smiling at her exit I said to myself “Patience is a virtue…” Then returned to editing the days blog.