Most Father’s Day’s are celebrated with breakfast in bed and generally trying to be nice with the old man. We had none of that this year. Very much like how the children treated Mother’s Day-like another day; today was much of the same. On occasion the kids would say “happy Father’s Day” to their dad but beyond that; nothing.
Yesterday the boy his father and I had a very candid conversation about how he views his parents. Considering how often we bump heads, I expected the boy to say something similar to “I like dad more than you…” To put it simply. But what I continually fail to remember, with my boy, nothing is simple. “I suspect you like your father more than me…” I said to him in all seriousness. “I wouldn’t say that..” The boy responded. “You’re definitely more intense and Dad’s more laid back. But I cannot justify your statement momma, I like you both the same-you know as my parents”. My husband chuckled and replied “Your mother can take it little man…she knows I’m the more lovable of the two…” Which prompted laughs from the boy and I. “Hey hey I’m not stepping into your competition…” The boy added before leaving the room.
Looking back at my hub I said, I’m more intense? I guess I’d rather be known for being “fierce”. Patting my leg my hubby replied, “You keep working on that sweetie…keep working on that….”
On Sunday a time arose when the boy was off with his Grandmother which left the doll, her dad and I alone for a few minutes. “What was it the boy called me yesterday….intense?” I said toward my husband. “Something like that” he replied. “Doll, which of the two of us do YOU like better?” I asked catching her off guard. “Uh, no comment!” she replied quickly. “Smart girl!!” Her father remarked. “No, no-the boy said I was intense and your dad was laid back. I’m just trying to get your point of view for comparison purposes”. I said as I watched her father roll his eyes.
The doll thought about my question for a moment and then replied “The boy, as much as I hate to admit this…is right. Dad is more laid back…except when he’s mad.” Glancing over at my husband I smiled as a mask of bewilderment covered his face. “…but you make me do chores and push me to do stuff I don’t want to.” The doll concluded. “Do you have a better word for “intense?” I asked…pushing her a little more. “Yes I do…’mom’.”
“What a politically correct bunch of nonsense!!” Her father spewed and we both began to laugh. “Well, how am I to know what you’re looking for….? ” The doll replied laughing. “There are no right or wrong answers doll…” I offered. “Oh don’t believe her when she says that doll” her father chimed in. Trying to keep my composure I swatted my husband; her father across the arm and then remarked, “I remember when I use to be laid back too. Maybe that’s what my next personal development in life will be–to return to what once was.” I said more to myself than to the other two. “Nah-that won’t work either…” The doll quickly replied. “Why?” I said. “Because we would think something was wrong with you and have you committed!” The doll remarked.
Smiling back at my husband who was shaking his head up and down in agreement, I couldn’t help but laugh…and remain intensely in love with my family.