Sunday afternoon, following the doll’s basketball team’s stunning 3-OT victory, the doll and her friend Stephanie rode home with my hubby, who drove separately on the off-chance that the game would run long. As luck would have it, I had a much-needed, pre-scheduled massage appointment to get to. Meanwhile the boy who spent the night at his grandmother’s, was oblivious to the fact the world does not revolve around him…again. As I drove toward my appointment, my cell phone rang through my car radio. Not paying attention to the number I answered, “Hello?” and was greeted by my son on the other end.
“Hellooo Momma!!” He said into the phone. “Hey Bay, where are you?” I replied. “In the driveway…where are you?” He answered. “The driveway..our driveway?” I inquired. “Yes, with Grammy.” “Ah, well the doll had a basketball game…” I began. “Oh. How did she do?” He asked, though I think his inquiry was more out of politeness, rather than interest. “Well her team won a very exciting game…” I said in return. “Is the game still going on?” He replied. “Bay…didn’t you just hear me say they won their game?” I said shaking my head. “Oh yeah, sorry, so when will you be home?” He asked. “Your dad has the doll and Stephanie with him. I’m on my way to a massage appointment but they should be home in the next ten minutes or so…” I explained. “So…is the doll inside?” He asked.
Looking at my car radio for a moment I replied, “Did you just hear what you asked me? Are you even paying attention to what I’m saying to you?” All I heard through the car speakers was his laughter. “I’m sorry I wondered if she were going to your massage appointment with you…” He explained, which still didn’t make any sense. “Bay you’re a goofus..” Which prompted him to laugh further adding, “A goofus…what’s that? Mom you really need to talk more clearly…” “No that’s what I meant to say!” I lied. “You’re a cross between a goof ball and a doofus” I said, trying to cover/convince him. But all I could hear through the car speakers was his giggling. “Mom you’re so funny…you’re a goofus!” He finally replied. “Be careful who you call names there bay…” I said, trying not to laugh as well. After a few seconds, once his laughing was under control he asked. “So…the doll is not with you..?” “Bay…for clarity…here we go. Your Dad, the doll and Stephanie will be home probably within the next ten minutes. I am off to get a massage. You are in the driveway. See you later” “Okay Momma…you goofus!” He said before quickly disconnecting the phone.
Later when I arrived home after the massage, the doll informed me her father had taken the girls out to lunch. “So did the boy hang out in the driveway?” I wondered aloud. “No…the old lady (Grammy) has a key and let him in…” My husband replied. “Too bad…sitting outside in the driveway waiting would have been good for him…” I said, which brought a smile to my son’s face. “Aw Momma, you really are a Goofus!”
Nah…nope you got that wrong bay…I thought to myself. I may be known as many things…but Goofus is not one of them. That role is exclusively yours.