Last week, news came that an old friend committed suicide. We were not close by any stretch of the imagination, but we grew up together, attended the same schools and in more recent years, talked on Facebook. Yet today, I’m still having trouble shaking the many “Why?” questions and thoughts running through my head. I dare say, many of us are doing the same.
Yet every day I read about kids of all ages, taking their lives, presumably due to bullying or fear of others finding out their sexual orientations, sexual identities or some other reason that I don’t understand. I read about these deaths and feel bad for their families, sometimes sending off a prayer their way, before moving along on my day.
Sad to think this has become my “normal” way of life these days.
Scary to believe this could now be a norm in today’s society.
Last year my doll read a library book that told the story of a teen’s suicide which opened the door for us to have a great conversation on the subject. I told her suicide was, to coin a popular phrase, “A permanent solution to a temporary problem”; an impulsive, selfish act. I may have also called the character a coward for taking their life, instead of searching to find a better solution, which included them being alive.
But in truth, I’ve never experienced any type of physical or mental pain that dragged me so low or taken any medications with depressive side effects. Thankfully I’ve never found myself in a situation that could convince me that suicide was the only way out. All I do know is how much we all wish we could have pulled him back. Last night a classmate, Don, posted his phone number to our class page imploring us to call him, should we ever have similar thoughts. In his words, “I don’t want to ever feel this way about anyone of you!! Let’s make a pact to NEVER let this happen to one of our dear classmates happen again“.
When I finished reading Don’s post, my first thought went back to Tom and his ability to keep us all connected. In death, he was reconnecting us again.
But dammit Tom, there were better ways to accomplish this goal. So many better ways…
If you’re a praying type of person, please keep Tom’s daughter Chelsea Lynn Ingham in your prayers. As you may surmise, she is devastated by her dad’s passing and needs all the prayers we can send her way. If you could also pray for his siblings and remaining family that would be great too. Lastly, pray that Tom found peace.