On the ride to school this morning, I conducted a brief interview with the boy concerning my merits as a blogger in capturing just who he and the doll really are. Here is a snippet of what I can remember from the conversation.
Caveat: He’s hilarious and I had a difficult time hearing everything he said over our shared laughter throughout much of the “interview”.
Me: “Because you and your sister have been so routinely boring this week, I’m forced to resort to drastic measures to come up with an interesting blog, so answer these questions, for me please”.
B: “Since my Spotify ended, what choice do I have?”
M: How do I rank, in your eyes as a ‘blogger”.
B: Eh, adequate.
M: Do I present a clear and concise representation of who you truly are inside the blog?
B: No, misrepresentation is the better word. You fabricate things all the time.
M: I wouldn’t say fabricate as much as I would say “take poetic license” with a few things…is that fair?
B: Mom, sometimes you all out lie–but that’s okay. When writing an entertainment blog, in order to bolster your appeal, there are needs to exaggerate your characters in order to make their boring existence more likable.
M:. Are you telling me you live a boring life?
B: Not me, the doll, though…whew!
M: Don’t let her hear you say that…
B: Since when does she ever listen to what I have to say?”
M: Good point. Now where were we, oh yeah, I don’t agree with your assessment or word choice, for that matter, But for the sake of argument, let me ask, are you okay with–as you put it, “my exaggerations” when it comes to you?
M: So you don’t mind me writing about your “boring” life in my blog?
B: Not at all. In fact, I rather enjoy being seen as a cartoon character for the middle-aged women/mothers who make up your target audience.
M: What? (choking on laughter here) Cartoon? Huh?
B: Cartoon characters is how you’ve written the doll and I, over the years. But that’s okay…”
M: Caricatures yes, but I wouldn’t go so far as calling you cartoons….I mean heck I can barely draw a straight line.
B: Well there you go. You answered your own question…
M: Huh? What are you talking about?”
B: By your own admission, you can’t draw a straight line–thusly, that explains why the doll and I are so crookedly written in your blog.
M: Bayyy… And, hey, on occasion, there are men who read my blog…
B: Few and far between. Besides, they’re related to you or in a really big need of some bad comic relief.
M: Anything else you would like to add?
A. I looovvvee you…
M: Yeah yeah, get out of my car and go to school.