The boy made plans with members of his Anime club to attend a gaming event last weekend. The plan was to meet in the school parking lot and then proceed to the event as one large group. “What day are you meeting?” I asked him. “Sunday. The plan is to meet around 1:30 pm in the school parking lot and then go over together,” he explained to me. Happy to hear he was actually planning on leaving my house and hanging out with friends his age, I looked forward to Sunday almost more than he did.
Saturday just after noon time, when I arrived at the boy’s high school to pick up the doll from her placement testing, my cell phone rang. “Mom, I just realized the event is today!” The boy announced. “Well, that’s bad planning on your part” I replied. “No, it’s your fault. I told you it was Saturday and now I’ve missed out!” Shocked by his reply, I returned, “How can this be my fault?” “BECAUSE I TOLD YOU IT WAS ON SATURDAY!” He loudly replied into the receiver. Unhappy with his tone of voice, I raised mine and said, “BAY, first of all, you will not talk to me in this manner. Secondly, how can this be my fault when you told me the event was on Sunday? And lastly, if you continue yelling at me then you will quickly see how unreasonable I can become.” I scolded. “NO, I told you it was Saturday…” He tried again. Hearing the frustration in his voice, I hung up the phone. Waited a minute and then called back. “MOM!” “Let me talk with your father!” I said into the receiver and quickly hubby came onto the line.
“Did he tell you what’s going on?” I asked. “Yes, they were supposed to meet at 11:30 am He said”. “Seriously? How did Sunday at 1:30 become Saturday at 11:30 am and why am I the one he’s blaming?” “Because you made him work this morning for the twenty dollars–and that’s what made him miss his window of opportunity to go,” He replied while I shook my head at the boy’s logic. “Can you bring him over here or down to the convention center to try and hook up with everyone in case his times were off too?” “Yes, okay, I can do that,”hubby replied.
Twenty minutes later, my hubby called to say they had waited in the parking lot of the school for overt hurry minutes and no one showed up. So, they were going for a walk at an area metro park. “The event runs until 11 pm.cant you just drop him off at the door?” I asked. “No, I’m not doing that. He has no way of contacting his friends–no cell numbers or texts. I’m not dropping him off to wander the facility hoping to run into someone. So we’re going to go walking and he’s going to think long and hard on his responsibility to his friends as well as to himself.”
Later he apologized for taking his anger at himself out on me and confided his need to be more responsive to paying attention