“Mom, I don’t get it…” the doll said, half smiling, yet mostly flabbergasted. “What’s that doll?” I asked. “Why is it that I can walk past this couch every day without incident, then out of the blue, the couch somehow jumped out at me, causing me to trip and run into the entertainment center?” She explained while rubbing her newly bruised thigh. “I hear ya doll, there have been several times when I’ve walked past an open door and somehow, inexplicably, my pants pocket have grabbed a hold of the door handle, causing the door to slam into my backside”. “Exactly!” She exclaimed. “Why does that happen?” She asked. Shaking my head, I replied, “It’s just one of the many mysteries in our lives,” and smiled.
“That’s a horrible answer,” she replied.
“Yeah, I agree. But that’s all I got. I mean seriously, if I tried to hook my pocket on the door handle as I walk past, nothing ever happens. Yet when I’m not trying, boom, I get caught and held in place. It’s like the universe is waiting to play a practical joke on me,” I replied.
“So what your saying is God is waiting for a chance to make fun of me–painfully, I might add?” She asked. “Probably not God per se, maybe some lesser demons or ghosts,” I began. “Who knows, maybe they have a wicked sense of humor…” I replied. “Well now you’re just freaking me out,” She said causing me to smile. “Next time the “couch” jumps out at you, act like Dick Van Dyke and somersault over the darn thing and keep moving forward as if nothing ever happened.
“Who?” She asked. “Dick Van Dyke,” I replied. She slightly turned head to the left and looked a bit befuddled. “Dick. Van. Dyke!” I replied again. Without giving me a hint of recognition, she said, “I guess that’s another one of your little mysteries, huh?” I looked back at my daughter shocked and asked, “How in God’s name did you escape learning who Dick Van Dyke is and his ability to gracefully recover from an ottoman attack?” Then, pointing at the couch, I ordered her to “Sit, watch and learn!” and then turned on Netflix and introduced her to the comic genius.
Afterward, I asked her, “So what did you think?” She shrugged her shoulders and said, “Eh, he was alright…” which in turn caused me to shake my head. Dear God, I can add my doll to the list of the many little mysteries in life.