The boy has taken exception to the way I talk, which isn’t too far off from when I used to chide my own mother, for the way she talked. “Mom, they’re called “I (short i) talians, not I (long I) talians. There is not country named ‘eye-taly’…” I used to scold. Nowadays the boy argues over my word choices. Not because they are wrong mind you, but rather because he doesn’t like my generalizations. “Why can’t you just say “iPod?” He asked. “I’d rather say device…” I replied. “Why? all I have is my iPod, so why not call it that?” He argued. “Because you also have a Nintendo game player and when you return to school, you’ll get your iPad back,” I explained. “What’s that have to do with anything?” He asked. “The way I see it is, simply referring to them as the lump sum term”device” covers an amalgam of sins,” I replied.
Shaking his head he said, “They’re not devices…they are an iPod and Nintendo game boy…” Looking back I decided to play a game with him, “Do they have access to the internet?” I asked. “Yes…” “Are they electronic in nature?” I asked, “Yes,” came his reply. “Are they small and hand held?” I questioned further. “Yes, but I don’t see what this has to do with the other…” He replied. “Easy, they’re small electronic devices. Yes, they may be different makes and models, but I don’t care. They are devices and therefore be known as devices to me…”
“Mom, I don’t understand you…” He said bluntly. “Welcome to the world of Mom and bay’s, bay. Now hand over your devices, it’s bedtime…” “What? it’s still early…” He said. “It’s almost 1 am,” I replied. “Fine, I’ll go to bed, but why can’t I keep my iPod and gameboy? He asked in an unwilling tone of voice. “Well, you can blame your father for that one. Seems he ran into you the other night going to the bathroom at 4 am and found you still awake playing on those devices. Guess what? You’re going to lose them at bedtime from now on…” I replied. “So what am I supposed to do now, stare at the ceiling for the next three hours?” He wondered. “That’s you’re prerogative bud, but I don’t recommend it. I’d suggest you close your eyes and go to sleep…” “Mom this is not fair!” He returned. “Yeah, well if you don’t like this arrangement, then get a job after school, save your money and move out… but until then… hand them over,” I explained.
“I’m handing them to you under protest,” He replied. “Understood,” I replied, grabbing the devices from him and hiding them in the living room. “Goodnight bay, love you,” I said as I headed off to bed. Grumbles and growls were his only return.