if only…


A certain intuition or second sense takes place in a child’s brain, the moment they sense a camera aimed in their direction. They will either begin exaggerating whatever they were doing, so as to ham up to the camera or they’ll begin yelling at the camera operator for having the audacity to r catch them off guard.

Of course there is a third possibility that they will not notice at all. But this hardly ever happens.

The other night, while leaning against my kitchen counter and looking down at my smart phone, I became aware of my doll who was seated at the kitchen table, reading lyrics to a song on her phone and singing along. I watched her sing for about a minute and when she didn’t seem to notice, I decided to test her second sense.

Leaving the camera off, I turned my phone in her direction and stood there for a minute, but instead of looking up, she continued singing, all the while reading the lyrics off her phone. Taking a small step away from the counter, I turned to face her and extended my left arm in front, so my phone was presented as a camera and continued to pretend. Incredulously, she didn’t notice my new position and continued to sing. Taking another step, this time toward her, extended the phone a little further away from my body, which finally caught her attention. Looking up from me she yelled, “Mom! Why are you doing that? I’m tone deaf, why are you trying to embarrass me? I look awful and sound awful! You need to…

Before she could finish, I turned the phone toward her and said, “I’m not…” and began to laugh. “MOM!! OH MY GOD!! YOU ARE SO MEAN. WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU? WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO ME?? YOU’RE SO MEAN!!” and then she began to laugh, not sure if she was more angry at the thought that I filmed her singing or that I hadn’t filmed her, only embarrassed her. Her father, overhearing the commotion entered the kitchen and said, “Well yah, that’s why they call your mom “Mean Mommy,” She even has a blog to prove it..” “Dad, stay out of this!” She scolded while I continued to laugh.

Though, I have to admit, I wish I had turned my phone’s camera on. I mean just think of the blackmail footage I’d have in addition to her continual embarrassment.







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