Yesterday I found myself sitting in the dentists chair, waiting to be told I need yet another crown. Two weeks earlier, while chewing a piece of gum, a million year-old silver filling decided to cut loose, leaving a nice crater in its wake. “Hello Marsha how are you?” The dentist asked making small talk. After I replied in kind, he began to tell me how he and his wife had just dropped their youngest off to college for his sophomore year. “I get to do that for my boy tomorrow-but for his freshman year,” I replied. Smiling, he replied, “Oh, you’re at the height of stress week!” I smiled and nodded. “Well, let me tell you, next year will be easier.” He said with a laugh adding, “Still stressful, but not nearly as much.”
So I guess my takeaway is to get through these next 24 hours and then we’re good…?
Easier said than done.
Earlier in the week, after not seeing much movement from the boy to gather his belongings to be washed and packed, I let him have it with both barrels. Unhappy with my unwanted attack, he replied by slamming his bedroom door several times which, engaged the sleeping giant-his father to react. Finally the boy yelled, “Why don’t you trust that I’m going to do this? I’m 18!! I’m an adult, I know I have responsibilities, I just work at a different speed than you do! This is my life, let me be in charge of my life!!”
“Well, okay then. You’re right, you are an adult. I won’t help you any longer, you are on your own….” I replied and left. Having asserted his own authority, the boy had no choice now, but to start participating in his move to college. Gathering up his dirty clothes to wash, packing time had finally arrived.
Of course his line about being in charge of his own life has certainly come in handy. “Mom, I need to get a lap desktop, could you take me to the store?” “Sure”, I replied. After finding what he wanted, we approached the cashier. Looking over at me he said, “Well?” “Well what?” I asked confused. “I kinda thought this was on you…” he suggested. “No, you’re the adult who didn’t want any help…” I returned. “Ugh, I knew you would find a way to make me regret my words,” he said, laboring to use his own money to pay for his own wants.
As I approached the receptionist to make future, not so fun appointments for my crown, the dentist came up to me and said, “One more thing to remember about tomorrow… this may be new for you, but old hat for the university. They know what they’re doing. Your boy is like cattle…moving through. From what little information you told me, he’s going to a good school. They will take good care of him. All you have to do is get him there, they’ll do the rest.”
For the first time ever, I left the dentist feeling better than before I walked in! A voice of truth and reason for a very stressed out Mean Mommy.