Monthly Archives: December 2017

a hard year….

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Who would have believed, last December, as I wrote my year end wrap up, I would find myself struggling to write my daily blog for much of this past year? I certainly didn’t. I began this blog in 2010, partly as a way to document my children’s growth from elementary school into adulthood and partly to give myself a creative outlet for my desire to write. I’ve often told people, “I’m not creative-I can’t draw a straight line or dance particularly well. But on occasion, I can spin a yarn or two.

Then this year hit and that ability to spin yarns became increasingly more difficult. On occasion, I had a great story to tell, but more often than not, I struggled. Even when I took some time off, to clear my head, I struggled to find something worthwhile to write about and no matter how many times I tried to come back, I found myself staring at the screen and wondering why I was torturing myself or you, for that matter.

Of course, I had help in failing. My aging laptop whose ability to recharge is at odds with the power cord needed to supply said charge; gave me a great excuse to step away from the blog circuit. Add to that my frustration at possessing fat fingered thumbs and fighting my phone’s predictive speech patterns, which at times left me wondering if this was all one big subliminal message (to stop writing completely) instead of finding an actual point?

Back in the days when I took care of Mary Alice, there was a three hour window where she would pray for her family members. As such, this gave me three hours to write my daily blog without worry. Well, those days are long gone and my need to stay “present” and engaged with my charges, takes all the energy I can muster through the day, which unfortunately, leaves me fairly drained by the time I arrive home.

But in the spirit of a hopeful 2018, let me at least attempt to get back on track with this one… here goes…

2017 was a year in which three great things happened in the boy’s life. 

1)He turned 18

2)He graduated High School

3)He left for college

2017 was a year when these three great things happened in the doll’s life…

1)Her friendships forged the year before, remained and better yet, grew exponentialy

2)Her brother left for college….

3)The long promised puppy finally entered her life and she’s a really good “Mom”.

in 2017, three great things happened in my husband’s life

1)He fulfilled his dream to buy a vacation place in/near Myrtle Beach, SC

2)His son left for college

3)He filed paperwork to retire in three years (God help us).

and for me, 

1)My son reached 18 without too many scars. I was told by many classmates how much they all loved him and he’s a good kid–which four years earlier I wondered if anyone his age would see his worth.

2)Four months after the loss of our rescue terrorist, I kept a long held promise to my daughter. Though I had deceived her, adding two years onto the original promise, all was forgiven when we brought home “Luna” the crazy Eskimo/blue heeler mix.

3)My husband and I now have a vision for our future. While time is always in flux, at least now we have some hopeful directions to follow.

Of course, there were many more than three catalysts for change we all experienced, but for the sake of the argument, these are the brightest of highlights. Moving forward as 2018 unfolds, I do hope to find the desire/energy and time to come back and write, or at the very least, to throw a photo up to be seen now and again. But, in keeping with my Mean Mommy Memoir status and applying a standard Mom Reply,  “We’ll see…”

Until then, have a wonderful and hopeful New Year. May the light of love find it’s way to your doorstep and fill your lives with joy.

Marsha, Mike, Dylan, Doll and Luna

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Soap and water…

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My son is home from college for Christmas break and while I’m happy he’s home, I have an inkling, he’s ready to go back. You see, he found himself in a bit a trouble toward the end of the school semester–running out of time for projects. In fact, one text exchange with me basically said, “I could continue to make myself crazy and try to finish the project in the limited time I had, or let it go and begin studying for the next exam…” Two guesses which one he chose…

Since he’s been home (Saturday Dec. 16), I’ve also taken him to task for not bathing. At school his chief excuse for not doing so was “I don’t have enough time…” Which translates into, “I sleep to the last possible second before class begins, so I can’t get that shower in before and then afterward, I’m to busy doing other things-some required, some for fun, to do much more than just fall into bed at the end of the night”. I asked him what his excuse yesterday is… “You’ve been home all day, playing video games… surely you could have found a moment to wash in between segments, right?” “I just don’t think about it…” He truthfully explained. “Perhaps maybe you should… I offered.

Yesterday, I accompanied him to get a hair cut, but since he’s eighteen, I really no longer have a say into how long he wears his hair. However, since I am paying for the clean-up, do get to offer unsolicited advice. As the woman began cutting his greasy overgrown hair she remarked, “You have such soft hair…” Realizing he would have to reply he said, “Well, honestly, I haven’t washed my hair for a few days–sorry…” Unfazed by his reply she countered, “That’s okay. Not washing your hair everyday, contrary to societal norms is actually good for your overall scalp and hair follicles,”. Seemingly before she had even finished that thought, my son shouted, “Did you hear that mom?” Smiling along with the other patrons and stylists, I replied, “Yes bay, I did. But she’s talking about your head…not your body…” He audibly grunted his disapproval at my reply, but turned his attention back to woman cutting his hair.

On the ride home, he asked, “Why is my showering so important to you…?” “Well, stink issues aside,” I began, “I’d like you to be successful. You see, when you’re interviewing for a job, you need to look clean and prosperous. If you don’t shower and clean, they will see a slob in front of them, not someone eager to positively influence their children. In addition, you must not like your friends too well because you’re not being considerate or respectful to them. If you can’t clean yourself for you, keep clean for them..” A small grunt came from his direction in reply, but I honestly believe halfway through my reply, he zoned out. Instead, the grunt was a more critical response toward me (can’t she just stop?) rather than an understanding of my point of view.

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Day three since he’s been home..still waiting for him to shower… “I will….” He tells me when asked and I’m sure he will, just not positive it will be any time soon (Maybe by Christmas eve?” ).